Thursday, October 4, 2007

Arrived At Catalyst.


We arrived yesterday at Catalyst in Atlanta. JoMax invited me to stay in his guest house last night - it's very nice - except I don't get the all the civil war oil paintings with JoMax in a gray uniform riding horses. Also, did he have that microphone surgically implanted in his ear? - I don't see any wires. There was a bookshelf full of his books next to the bed - so as a joke I signed them all with "To Rick Warren, thanks for being the inspiration for this book - John"

JoMax woke me up at 5:30am to have what he called a "Leadership Cabinet Devotional Meeting." I thought it was just going to be us - but when I showed up in my bathrobe - he had 14 of his lieutenants there. The room was an exact mock-up of the oval office. His "Minister of Conferences" had all the latest un-fudged attendance figures for all the Christian conferences during the last six months. How does he get that stuff?

There was a brief interruption when we were told that 10,000 kazoo's being flown in from China for Catalyst would be delayed for 24 hours. (Apparently last year they had 10,000 pillows and the year before 10,000 whoopie cushions for some kind of Guinness Book of World Records thing they do at Catalyst)

At the end of the meeting I was handed cue cards with "areas of interest" that I was instructed to incorporate into my keynote. Then, some freckled faced kid told me he had been assigned to me to assist with any additional speech revisions I might need - mysteriously - he already had a copy of the speech I wrote. He said he had taken the liberty to make some changes to it.

Where am I?

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